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Other Title: 10 Reasons to be Okay with Being Disliked If your number one goal is to make sure that everyone likes and approves of you, then you risk sacrificing your uniqueness, and, therefore, your excellence. ~Unknown We all know at least one hardcore people-pleaser. You know the signs: She sleeps out in the rain and gets a cold so her friends dog can fit in the tent. He lends money to his friends, knowing they wont pay him back, then struggles to pay his own bills. If a friend calls her stupid, she whips up a batch of cookies and makes a card that reads, Sorry for disappointing you. And despite all their efforts to be liked by everyone, many people disrespect them. Maybe thats you, maybe its notbut odds are, you can relate at least a little to the desire to be well-liked. Who doesnt want to feel accepted, respected, and appreciated? For most of my life, my need to be liked overshadowed all my other needs. I was always trying to manipulate perception, adapting myself to receive validation. It was draining and counterproductive, since very few people actually knew me the real mewhich is a prerequisite to liking me. Ive since learned its actually a good sign if there are some people who dont accept or agree with me. Im not suggesting we should be rude, inconsiderate, or disrespectful. This post isnt about disregarding other peoples feelings. This is about releasing our stress about other peoples opinions. When youre comfortable not being liked by everyone: 1. It allows you to be true to yourself. The biggest disservice you can do yourself is shapeshifting to please your audience of the moment. Its exhausting (even to watch) and, more importantly, pointless. No one will get to know who you really are, which will leave you feeling empty. 2. It gives you the power to say no. I believe people are good at heart. Still, its human nature to test each others boundaries. When youre willing to risk being disliked, youre able to say no when you need to. Your yeses and nos shapes your future, so choose them wisely. 3. Youre more comfortable exploring your feelings. Doesnt it feel good to just be where you are without pretending for someone elses sake? Im not saying you should act in anger or fear, just that its pretty exhilarating to say, Hell yeahIm terrified (or lonely or weak or struggling) regardless of what people will think. 4. Your candor can help other people. An angst-filled younger me made a fake voodoo doll for a middle school teacher who was hard on me, but forever changed my life (not my proudest moment). Its often the least popular people who strike the deepest chord in us. Be unpopular when necessary and push people to be their best. You just may save someones life. 5. You can freely express your thoughts. One of the kindest things you can do for someone else is listen without judging. You deserve that same kindness, but you wont always get it. People will form opinions as you speak. Talk anyway. Let your words be kind but fearless. 6. It prepares you for greater success. Pick a popular Twitter user and look at their @replies. Odds are they field their fair share of harsh comments. The higher you rise, the more attention youll receive, both positive and negative. A willingness to be disliked helps you deal with the added scrutiny. 7. It teaches you to offer kindness and compassion without expectations. Its not difficult to offer compassion to someone who treats you with respect and kindness. Whats more valuable for your personal development, and to humanity as whole, is the ability to do whats right because its rightnot because you get something in return. 8. You can inspire other people. There is someone I know who has the uncanny ability to keep going even when others try to pull her down. I learn from her every day. To this woman, anyone who doesnt appreciate her assertive, over-the-top personality is a reminder that she is unique and unafraid. 9. You can use your time wisely. If you want to be liked by everyone, odds are youre spreading yourself way too thin trying to keep them all happy. We need to use our time judiciously to enrich ourselves and others instead of worrying about everyones perceptions. 10. You can choose to smile anyway. You could use your energy to make daily inventories of everything thats wrong the money you dont have, the esteem you didnt earn, the people you disappointed. Or you could commit to being your best, and then just sit back and smile. Life will always be a balancing act. Learn to teeter in serenity. Post Comment Private Reply Ignore Thread Top Page Up Full Thread Page Down Bottom/Latest
#1. To: Gatlin (#0)
This site has been very successful at attracting queer JBT Canaries like Boris, Whitey & Gatlin. It's romper room for retards.
Are you OK with being disliked? You better be.
I have the BEST enemies, the best!
"I ask you to judge me by the enemies I have made."
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