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The Water Cooler
See other The Water Cooler Articles

Title: Police Need Your Help In Capturing "Masked Masturbator" Who Is Targeting Seattle Residence
Source: the smoking gun
URL Source: http://www.thesmokinggun.com/buster ... unt-creepy-nightcrawler-189307
Published: Mar 14, 2016
Author: the smoking gun
Post Date: 2016-03-15 09:57:46 by misterwhite
Keywords: None
Views: 3820
Comments: 18

Seattle police are seeking the public’s help in identifying a suspected serial masturbator who publicly pleasures himself while disguising his identity with a makeshift ninja outfit.

Cops first learned of the masked pervert in January, after a woman called 911 to report that a man was “masturbating outside the front door of her home.” Cops responding to the scene were unable to locate the suspect.

Last month, a night vision camera outside the woman’s residence recorded the suspect again pleasuring himself next to the front door. As seen above and below, the surveillance images--which captured the masked masturbator in the act--show him dressed head-to-toe in dark clothing (the night vision camera makes dark colors appear white).

As seen above, the suspect was wearing a pair of rubberized five toe shoes.

Residents of the targeted home are University of Washington students who say that they have “heard suspicious sounds outside their house on several occasions,” according to cops. Investigators believe that the masked masturbator may have been at the residence four times over the past several months.

Anyone with information about the creepy nightcrawler is asked to contact police at (206) 684-5575. (1 image)

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#1. To: All (#0)

OK. Where are all my Libertarian friends coming to this man's defense? Why is this against the law? He's not harming anyone.

misterwhite  posted on  2016-03-15   9:59:50 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#2. To: misterwhite (#1)

DNA evidence should be pretty easy to collect.

Tooconservative  posted on  2016-03-15   10:15:34 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#3. To: TooConservative (#2)

"DNA evidence should be pretty easy to collect."

Perhaps. But you're not going to charge this guy, are you? What did he do?

misterwhite  posted on  2016-03-15   10:28:25 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#4. To: misterwhite (#1)

When did Youklown move to Seattle ?

Si vis pacem, para bellum

Those who beat their swords into plowshares will plow for those who don't

Rebellion to tyrants is obedience to God.

There are no Carthaginian terrorists.

President Obama is the greatest hoax ever perpetrated on the American people. --Clint Eastwood

"I am concerned for the security of our great nation; not so much because of any threat from without, but because of the insidious forces working from within." -- General Douglas MacArthur

Stoner  posted on  2016-03-15   10:30:02 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#5. To: Stoner (#4)

"When did Youklown move to Seattle ?"

I thought it was Deckard.

misterwhite  posted on  2016-03-15   10:36:38 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#6. To: misterwhite (#0)

Well, he's right handed so that eliminates some.

Fred Mertz  posted on  2016-03-15   10:48:08 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#7. To: Fred Mertz (#6)

He's left handed - a camera is a mirror

Vicomte13  posted on  2016-03-15   15:05:16 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#8. To: misterwhite (#0)

As seen above, the suspect was wearing a pair of rubberized five toe shoes.

and everyone laughed when Al Bundy created "god's shoes", first time I saw these 5 toed shoes I just burst out laughing.

calcon  posted on  2016-03-15   15:12:56 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#9. To: misterwhite (#0)

I don't know how they're going to find this guy in a city when everyone is a big JERK OFF.

calcon  posted on  2016-03-15   15:13:48 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#10. To: misterwhite (#5)

GFY.

You're the only one on record here who claims he's doing nothing wrong.

Effing pervert.

“Truth is treason in the empire of lies.” - Ron Paul

In a Cop Culture, the Bill of Rights Doesn’t Amount to Much

Americans who have no experience with, or knowledge of, tyranny believe that only terrorists will experience the unchecked power of the state. They will believe this until it happens to them, or their children, or their friends.
Paul Craig Roberts

Deckard  posted on  2016-03-15   19:50:17 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#11. To: Deckard (#10)

You should just turn yourself in.

misterwhite  posted on  2016-03-16   12:29:28 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#12. To: misterwhite (#0)

Does Rapey Billy Clinton have an alibi for the evenings in question?

Hank Rearden  posted on  2017-01-20   11:24:17 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#13. To: misterwhite (#1)

Why is this against the law? He's not harming anyone.

You're the only one here claiming that.

“Truth is treason in the empire of lies.” - Ron Paul

Those who most loudly denounce Fake News are typically those most aggressively disseminating it.

Deckard  posted on  2017-01-20   12:43:13 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#14. To: misterwhite (#11)

Asshole.

You have been the one defending perverts here at LF all along.

Does the name "Hastert" ring a bell?

“Truth is treason in the empire of lies.” - Ron Paul

Those who most loudly denounce Fake News are typically those most aggressively disseminating it.

Deckard  posted on  2017-01-20   12:44:35 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#15. To: Hank Rearden (#12)

"Does Rapey Billy Clinton have an alibi for the evenings in question?"

He's a Libertarian (or is that libertine?) and believes that since no one is harmed by this activity it should be legal.

misterwhite  posted on  2017-01-20   12:51:30 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#16. To: Deckard (#14)

"Does the name "Hastert" ring a bell?"

Sure. But he wasn't convicted of any perversion.

misterwhite  posted on  2017-01-20   12:59:32 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#17. To: misterwhite, aka 'Mr Obsessed with Masturbation' (#0)

As soon as I read the title, I knew this was a misterwhite/robertpausen post.

The poor creep has been writing about masturbation since the early years of FR.

tpaine  posted on  2017-01-20   13:00:42 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#18. To: Hank Rearden, y'all, and 'Mr Obsessed With Masterbation' (#12)

Hank Rearden (#12)

"Does Rapey Billy Clinton have an alibi for the evenings in question?"

He's a Libertarian (or is that libertine?) and believes that since no one is harmed by this activity it should be legal. ---- misterwhite

Libertarians agree that laws against public masturbation are constitutional.

Only 'Mr Obsessed With Masterbation' raises this in order to satisfy his perversion with the subject.

tpaine  posted on  2017-01-20   15:00:59 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


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