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Title: Potted Meat Review
Source:
http://www.thesneeze.com/steve-dont-eat-it/
URL Source: [None]
Published: Apr 22, 2015
Author: the sneeze
Post Date: 2015-04-22 05:36:04 by no gnu taxes
Keywords: None
Views: 5090
Comments: 30
Potted Meat Food Product
There aren't too many products that feel the need to reassure you that they are, in fact, "food." Already not a good sign.
The list of ingredients is long and horrifying, coming right out of the gate with "MECHANICALLY SEPARATED CHICKEN." Oddly enough, I'm about to be separated from my lunch, and I haven't even opened the can yet.
Other ingredients include BEEF TRIPE, BEEF HEARTS, AND "PARTIALLY DE-FATTED COOKED PORK FATTY TISSUE" How does one de-fat fat? Bizarre. God knows what else is in here.
Okay, I'm going to go try it now. If i'm not back in ten minutes, call Poison Control...
I'm back. Oofah.
Okay, here we go-- Pulling back the lid (not recommended) lets loose an odor that punches you in the nose like a stinky fist. If you've ever smelled a can of dog food, it's just like that. Only imagine you are opening the can while your head is wedged in a horse's ass.
Inside is a smooth, oddly pink meat paste. So smooth, in fact, I dare call it "creamy." (I actually got a little gaggy just typing that.) Surprisingly, it was a little spicier than I expected. Although, that sensation may have been a by-product of my tastebuds dying.
The can shows a serving suggestion of the Potted Meat being served on squares of toast. I would also suggest squares of toilet paper. Or maybe a nice diaper.
All I can tell you is, I survived the first installment of "Steve, Don't Eat It." And I have to admit it may have even been a little educational. I know I learned at least one thing from "Ralph's Potted Meat"-- Ralph is a fucking dick.
Not surprisingly, I've come up with a little slogan the peeps who handle Potted Meat Marketing can use (no charge, as always): POTTED MEAT FOOD PRODUCT: Made By, For, And With Assholes. (2 images)
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Begin Trace Mode for Comment # 25.
#3. To: no gnu taxes (#0) (Edited)
The other day I was making a salami & swiss sandwich
for lunch. As I was making it, I casually read the
ingredients of the salami. It contains BEEF HEARTS.
I never knew that. I ate the sandwich, and the rest
of the salami is in the fridge. I'll eat it.
But I haven't decided yet if I'm ever going to buy any more.
#4. To: Chuck_Wagon (#3)
Heart is best when warm and dripping, fresh out of the kill. -- Otherwise, cool it as soon as possible, slice it fairly thin, and saute in butter just long enough to heat it thoroughly. --- Bon appetite...
#7. To: tpaine, Chuck_Wagon (#4)
Heart is best when warm and dripping, fresh out of the kill.
I don't think Shop-Rite is slaughtering live animals. YET.
Otherwise, cool it as soon as possible, slice it fairly thin, and saute in butter just long enough to heat it thoroughly. --- Bon appetite...
Probably a delicacy back in the day. Do you enjoy this dish? And do you suggest the fava beans with a playful Chianti?
#12. To: Liberator (#7) (Edited)
If you don't care for liver, don't eat the heart. IMHO, close to same taste and texture. I've eaten both... but I don't like it enough to take them from all the little hungry critters in the food chain that would eat them. I leave both with the gut pile.
Most people I know, pickle the heart and eat it that way
#18. To: GrandIsland, tpaine (#12)
If you don't care for liver, don't eat the heart. IMHO, close to same taste and texture.I've eaten both... but I don't like it enough to take them from all the little hungry critters in the food chain that would eat them. I leave both with the gut pile.
NOT a big fan of either?
Naw, I don't like liver either...or any organ meat. Guess I was spoiled/fortunate in that sense that my family never had to. Reckon, what you grow up eating molds your palate and aversion to certain food. People are like that with a lotta seafood and shellfish. I have a good friend who won't eat shrimp....because it reminds her of a fetus.
Most people I know, pickle the heart and eat it that way.
Not enough money in the world....
#24. To: Liberator (#18)
I don't like liver either...or any organ meat. Guess I was spoiled/fortunate in that sense that my family never had to.
We never had to eat liver or heart, but my parents liked it by choice. -- And during the war, we slaughtered hogs in our suburban back yard to supplement our meat ration. We ate everything but the squeal.
#25. To: tpaine (#24)
....During the war, we slaughtered hogs in our suburban back yard to supplement our meat ration. We ate everything but the squeal.
Lol...NOT the tail as well??
Yeah, I can see why it'd become an delicious part of your cuisine. That was during a time when many people went hungry. Far before the supermarket generation.
Replies to Comment # 25.
Far before the supermarket generation.
I live in NC now, and I see pig tails, pig ears, and pig feet in the fresh meats section of the supermarket. There are pig intestines (chitlins) and other pig innards in the frozen foods.
End Trace Mode for Comment # 25.
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