Mexican Invasion
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Title: B of A and Illegal Aliens--perfect for each other!
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Published: Feb 15, 2007
Author: John W. Lillpop
Post Date: 2007-02-15 16:41:59 by alwaysontheright
Keywords: None
Views: 1207
Comments: 2
Bank of "AMERICA"? Hardly! Satire by John W. Lillpop As further testament to the fact that some American business entities will stoop to unbelievable and despicable depths in pursuit of more profit, the so-called Bank of America has decided to troll the illegal alien market for gold. Forsaking legitimate concerns about homeland security, rule of law, U.S. sovereignty, and American language and culture, vipers at BofA have announced that credit cards will be offered to "undocumented immigrants," more correctly known as illegal aliens. Under this anti-America plan, criminals here illegally will be able to establish credit without providing a social security number. That is great news for outlaws who have broken into America, but bad news for those who make huge fortunes by selling stolen identities to invaders. Beltway insider Opel Bijiquiovarti has looked into this latest corporate snubbing of America by BofA and has filed the following executive summary: According to Bijiquiovarti, BofA hopes to take advantage of undereducated, impoverished illegal aliens in order to make money. Specifically, by reading the small print, one learns that the BofA terms include a computer program language translation fee (from Cobalt to Spanish), a "We will not turn you in to ICE" senorcharge, and other miscellaneous assessments. In sidebar agreements being negotiated between BofA and several state governments, monthly credit card payments can be deducted from welfare payments and deposited directly into BofA coffers. For a fee, of course. All in all, Bijiquiovarti reports that the average illegal alien who signs up for a card with $500 credit card limit will be charged $480.12 in setup fees, leaving the illegal alien less than $20.00 to spend. BofA officials, speaking on condition of anonymity, told Bijiquiovarti that this fee structure would ultimately work to the advantage of illegal aliens. This is so because the BofA plan limits the amount of money available for the purchase of alcohol, high-fat tacos, spicy burritos, and other products that could get an illegal alien into a legal kerfuffle, and subjected to deportation. According to bank officials, the BofA plan is yet another example of the bank's ongoing efforts to reach out and help the little guy. Bank of America and illegal aliens: Both are bad for America--perfect for each other! satirebylillpop John Lillpop is a recovering liberal, 'clean and sober' since 1992 when last he voted for a Democrat. Pray for John: He lives in the San Francisco Bay Area, where people like Nancy Pelosi are considered reasonable! Writing is his passion. He loves creating lively copy with irony and humor!
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#1. To: alwaysontheright (#0)
Ah-HaHaHa!! All one has to do is look at their fee and fine schedules, and the truth will be known. "...help the little guy." What hogwash. Never once did a usury bank want to, "help". It's all about making money. And their methods include pure lies embedded in ad campaigns and PR. By encouraging the little brown ones to come to the USA illegally and become debt slaves, makes me wonder where the market is migrating. I quess natural born, legal Americans are max'd out in credit, so they need some more slaves. The Chamber of Communism will be there to help with this project, no doubt. B of A lost customers when (1998) they went to offering sodomite employee's partners full benefits, like a legitamate spouse would get. They aren't the best bank around for many reasons. I won't use them.
"If I thought this war was to abolish slavery, I would resign my commission, and offer my sword to the other side." --Ulysses S. Grant
Even Homoland Insecurity has chimed in on B of A: BofA's credit card offer to illegal immigrants spurs backlash Tampa Bay Business Journal - 12:08 PM EST Wednesday, February 14, 2007 Bank of America found itself at the center of the nation's immigration controversy following reports it's offering credit cards to illegal immigrants in Los Angeles. In the wake of the media firestorm, the nation's second-largest and Tampa Bay's largest bank, told the Los Angeles Times it complies fully with all banking and antiterrorism laws governing customer identification, which permit the use of individual taxpayer identification numbers, or ITINs, issued by the Internal Revenue Service. Critics say that it's too easy for undocumented immigrants to receive ITINs. "At face value the program seems to be problematic," Russ Knocke, a spokesman for the Department of Homeland Security, told the Times. "It seems to be lending itself to possibilities of perpetrating identity theft or creating more risk for money laundering." In the Los Angeles market test, BofA (NYSE: BAC) is offering credit cards to Spanish-speaking customers with no Social Security numbers, the Wall Street Journal reported. The credit card offering, which features a $500 credit limit, requires applicants to have a checking account with the bank for three months without an overdraft, the newspaper added. BofA reportedly tested the credit card program last year at five branches in Los Angeles and hopes to roll the program out nationally later this year. As of June 30, the most recent date for which information is available, Bank of America (NYSE: BAC) had 172 offices, $15.3 billion in deposits and a 22.7 percent market share in Tampa Bay, according to the Federal Deposit Insurance Corp. The number of illegal immigrants in the Tampa area is not as easily tracked, however the number of illegal immigrants in the state is substantial enough for former Gov. Jeb Bush to have endorsed a bill, in 2004, that would have allowed them to get driver's licenses. Florida law enforcement agencies voiced their concerns and the measure failed.
"If I thought this war was to abolish slavery, I would resign my commission, and offer my sword to the other side." --Ulysses S. Grant
According to bank officials, the BofA plan is yet another example of the bank's ongoing efforts to reach out and help the little guy.
#2. To: alwaysontheright (#0)
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