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Humor
See other Humor Articles

Title: Pre-Season College Football Quiz
Source: [None]
URL Source: [None]
Published: Sep 1, 2010
Author: UNKNOWN
Post Date: 2010-09-01 18:48:13 by sneakypete
Keywords: None
Views: 7475
Comments: 12

FOOTBALL TRUTHS ....Its that time of the year and we need to remember a few things about some of the more famous (?) football teams .

(1) What does the average Univ. of Florida player get on his SATs? ........Drool.

(2) What do you get when you put 32 West Virginia cheerleaders in one room? ........A full set of teeth.

(3) How do you get a Nebraska cheerleader into your dorm room? ........Grease her hips and push.

(4) How do you get an Ohio State graduate off your porch? .........Pay him for the pizza.

(5) How do you know if an Alabama football player has a girlfriend? ......There is tobacco spit on both sides of his pickup.

(6) Why is the Kentucky football team like a possum? ....Because they play dead at home and get killed on the road.

(7) What are the longest three years of a Texas Longhorn football player's life? ........His freshman year.

( How many Oklahoma freshmen does it take to change a light bulb? ........None. That's a sophomore course.

(9) Where was O. J. Headed in the white Bronco? ....... Durham, North Carolina. He knew that the police would never look at Duke for a Heisman Trophy winner.

(10) How do you keep an FSU football player out of your front yard? . . . . . . . Erect a goal post!

AND FINALLY (drum roll and cymbal clash).....

(11) Why did Tennessee choose orange as their team color? ........You can wear it to the game on Saturday, hunting on Sunday, and picking up trash along the highways the rest of the week.

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#1. To: sneakypete (#0)

You know what pisses me off? What happened to USC over their "Practices".

I mean talk about handing out speeding tickets at the Indy 500. What bullshit is that.

I piss on all your teams. All of them.

Clinton and Cuomo are the true bandits who lit the fuse to this economic crisis we're now in. All in the name of getting more minorities in houses: http://libertysflame.com/cgi-bin/readart.cgi?ArtNum=12554

Nebuchadnezzar  posted on  2010-09-01   20:30:24 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#2. To: sneakypete (#0)

(6) Why is the Kentucky football team like a possum? ....Because they play dead at home and get killed on the road.

I attended the triple overtime game where they beat LSU in Lexington. I think it was in 2007. LSU won the national championship that year.

Only Kentucky game I ever attended.


"Lets [sic] rent a room." ~ Tull to Rotara

Fred Mertz  posted on  2010-09-01   21:01:12 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#3. To: Nebuchadnezzar (#1)

Headline....

Former USC Quarterback Matt Leinart Dancing Toward Irrelevancy.

Parrot with speed dial  posted on  2010-09-01   21:23:36 ET  (1 image) Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#4. To: Nebuchadnezzar (#1)

I piss on all your teams. All of them.

Whatever you say, mad dog jr.

Friggin' lunatic.


"Lets [sic] rent a room." ~ Tull to Rotara

Fred Mertz  posted on  2010-09-01   21:45:42 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#5. To: Fred Mertz (#4)

Whatever you say, mad dog jr.

Friggin' lunatic.

Oh give me a break. Talking smack with respect to sports is as old as the sport in question itself.

Man Fred, you really need to unwind.

Clinton and Cuomo are the true bandits who lit the fuse to this economic crisis we're now in. All in the name of getting more minorities in houses: http://libertysflame.com/cgi-bin/readart.cgi?ArtNum=12554

Nebuchadnezzar  posted on  2010-09-01   21:59:08 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#6. To: Nebuchadnezzar (#5)

I piss on all your teams. All of them.

Did you see what you posted, e_type_jagoff?

You're the loose cannon.


"Lets [sic] rent a room." ~ Tull to Rotara

Fred Mertz  posted on  2010-09-01   22:01:55 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#7. To: Fred Mertz (#6)

Did you see what you posted, e_type_jagoff?

You're the loose cannon.

Wow, you are thin-skinned.

What ever. I'll make you a deal, you leave me alone-don't respond to my threads and i'll leave you alone.

Deal?

Clinton and Cuomo are the true bandits who lit the fuse to this economic crisis we're now in. All in the name of getting more minorities in houses: http://libertysflame.com/cgi-bin/readart.cgi?ArtNum=12554

Nebuchadnezzar  posted on  2010-09-01   22:15:52 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#8. To: Nebuchadnezzar (#7)

No.

You, apologize for calling me a Mothe*fker.

Then we'll start over again. It might work.


"Lets [sic] rent a room." ~ Tull to Rotara

Fred Mertz  posted on  2010-09-01   22:18:19 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#9. To: Fred Mertz (#8)

No.

You, apologize for calling me a Mothe*fker.

Then we'll start over again. It might work.

Sorry, I won't do it twice. Where you apologized and said someone had "gotten your goat" I respond with an apology.

Now, you have your apology, shall we part on civil terms?

Clinton and Cuomo are the true bandits who lit the fuse to this economic crisis we're now in. All in the name of getting more minorities in houses: http://libertysflame.com/cgi-bin/readart.cgi?ArtNum=12554

Nebuchadnezzar  posted on  2010-09-01   22:32:53 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#10. To: Nebuchadnezzar (#9)

I'll start all over again with you.


"Lets [sic] rent a room." ~ Tull to Rotara

Fred Mertz  posted on  2010-09-01   22:34:57 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#11. To: Fred Mertz (#10)

I'll start all over again with you.

Not till we clear up a few things:

1. What was the question you asked and I didn't answer. I get real busy with 4 kids in the house so you'll excuse me if I don't read each word here on LF.

2. You and I have always had at it. I don't know who started it, but to say I recently called you a "moron" and you're going to call me a fuck-head and what not tells me something is up.

3. Why not take up the offer I just made about ignoring each other? If I'm such a "troll" and a Mad Dog Jr. I don't know why you'd want to start over with me.

Clinton and Cuomo are the true bandits who lit the fuse to this economic crisis we're now in. All in the name of getting more minorities in houses: http://libertysflame.com/cgi-bin/readart.cgi?ArtNum=12554

Nebuchadnezzar  posted on  2010-09-01   23:12:59 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


#12. To: Nebuchadnezzar (#11)

3. Why not take up the offer I just made about ignoring each other?

Okay, that sounds like a plan.


"Lets [sic] rent a room." ~ Tull to Rotara

Fred Mertz  posted on  2010-09-02   8:48:51 ET  Reply   Trace   Private Reply  


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