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Title: The Bible,Dr. Laura,and them damn homos!
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Published: Aug 10, 2010
Author: James M. Kauffman
Post Date: 2010-08-10 09:33:13 by sneakypete
Keywords: None
Views: 100450
Comments: 137
In her radio show, Dr Laura Schlesinger said that, as an observant Orthodox Jew, homosexuality is an abomination according to Leviticus 18:22, and cannot be condoned under any circumstance.
The following response is an open letter to Dr. Laura, written by a US man, and posted on the Internet. It's funny, as well as informative:
Dear Dr. Laura:
Thank you for doing so much to educate people regarding God's Law. I have learned a great deal from your show, and try to share that knowledge with as many people as I can. When someone tries to defend the homosexual lifestyle, for example, I simply remind them that Leviticus 18:22 clearly states it to be an abomination ... End of debate.
I do need some advice from you, however, regarding some other elements of God's Laws and how to follow them.
1. Leviticus 25:44 states that I may possess slaves, both male and female, provided they are from neighboring nations. A friend of mine claims that this applies to Mexicans, but not Canadians. Can you clarify? Why can't I own Canadians?
2. I would like to sell my daughter into slavery, as sanctioned in Exodus 21:7. In this day and age, what do you think would be a fair price for her?
3. I know that I am allowed no contact with a woman while she is in her period of Menstrual uncleanliness - Lev.15: 19-24. The problem is how do I tell? I have tried asking, but most women take offense.
4. When I burn a bull on the altar as a sacrifice, I know it creates a pleasing odor for the Lord - Lev.1:9. The problem is my neighbors. They claim the odor is not pleasing to them. Should I smite them?
5. I have a neighbor who insists on working on the Sabbath. Exodus 35:2 clearly states he should be put to death. Am I morally obligated to kill him myself, or should I ask the police to do it?
6. A friend of mine feels that even though eating shellfish is an abomination, Lev. 11:10, it is a lesser abomination than homosexuality. I don't agree. Can you settle this? Are there 'degrees' of abomination?
7. Lev. 21:20 states that I may not approach the altar of God if I have a defect in my sight. I have to admit that I wear reading glasses. Does my vision have to be 20/20, or is there some wiggle-room here?
8. Most of my male friends get their hair trimmed, including the hair around their temples, even though this is expressly forbidden by Lev. 19:27. How should they die?
9. I know from Lev. 11:6-8 that touching the skin of a dead pig makes me unclean, but may I still play football if I wear gloves?
10. My uncle has a farm. He violates Lev.19:19 by planting two different crops in the same field, as does his wife by wearing garments made of two different kinds of thread (cotton/polyester blend). He also tends to curse and blaspheme a lot. Is it really necessary that we go to all the trouble of getting the whole town together to stone them? Lev.24:10-16. Couldn't we just burn them to death at a private family affair, like we do with people who sleep with their in-laws? (Lev. 20:14) I know you have studied these things extensively and thus enjoy considerable expertise in such matters, so I'm confident you can help. Thank you again for reminding us that God's word is eternal and unchanging.
Your adoring fan.
James M. Kauffman, Ed.D. Professor Emeritus, Dept. Of Curriculum, Instruction, and Special Education University of Virginia PS (It would be a damn shame if we couldn't own a Canadian)
Poster Comment:
I like the part about Canadians best of all.
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#1. To: All, *Hypocrisy and Hypocrites* (#0)
ping
"I adore John McCain, support him 100 percent and will do everything I can to support his reelection. As everyone knows, I was honored and proud to run with him. And Todd and I were with him in D.C. just a week ago." (Sarah Palin,Dec 2009) ************************************ DID Palin say or write these things or not? (Me) I don't know or F ing care. (Mad Dog posted on 2009-12-26 16:36:33 ET,post # 105 http://libertysflame.com/cgi-bin/readart.cgi?ArtNum=5510&Disp=114#C114)
#2. To: Abu el Banat (#0)
PING
This is also from a West Wing episode...
#3. To: sneakypete (#0)
In her radio show, Dr Laura Schlesinger said that, as an observant Orthodox Jew
How old is this? I thought she gave up the whole Jew schtick years ago.
#4. To: no gnu taxes (#3)
How old is this?
Beats me. I don't listen to talk radio. If mine is on I am listening to music.
"I adore John McCain, support him 100 percent and will do everything I can to support his reelection. As everyone knows, I was honored and proud to run with him. And Todd and I were with him in D.C. just a week ago." (Sarah Palin,Dec 2009) ************************************ DID Palin say or write these things or not? (Me) I don't know or F ing care. (Mad Dog posted on 2009-12-26 16:36:33 ET,post # 105 http://libertysflame.com/cgi-bin/readart.cgi?ArtNum=5510&Disp=114#C114)
#5. To: sneakypete (#1)
In July 2003, Schlessinger announced on her show that she was no longer an Orthodox Jew. In a series of monologues following that announcement, she explained that she did not feel a connection with God, and felt frustrated by the effort she had put into following the religion. Her religious approach on the show lessened substantially after this announcement. In December 2006, she stated that she was outraged that a Rabbi was demanding that a menorah be put in the Seattle International airport adjacent to a Christian holiday display. Schlessinger then said that she would be putting a Christmas tree up in her own house.
#6. To: war (#2)
The letter predates the WW episode. Sorkin was given a copy of that letter and liked it so much he wrote it in the scene you were referring to.
#7. To: no gnu taxes (#5)
At least she got rich, which seemed to be her main goal.
Were you ever in the music or song writing business? ... e_type_jagoff to Mudboy lol
#8. To: Bartcoprules (#6)
Thanks for clarification...
#9. To: no gnu taxes, Bartoprules (#5)
Schlessinger then said that she would be putting a Christmas tree up in her own house.
You sure it wasn't a "bush"?
[snicker]
#10. To: no gnu taxes (#5)
I listen to her all the time due to her station getting the best reception in my area where there are lots of dead spots. I like her, as she's mainly for the health and welfare of kids versus the shenanigans of adults.
And she still says from time to time that she's Jewish, especially when matters about other religions are brought up.
"See in my line of work, you got to keep repeating things over and over and over again for the truth to sink in, to kind of catapult the propaganda." --- George W. Bush (Rochester NY, 5-24-2005)
#11. To: Liberator, All, *Bill of Rights-Constitution*, *Religious History and Issues*, *Hypocrisy and Hypocrites* (#0)
ping
"I adore John McCain, support him 100 percent and will do everything I can to support his reelection. As everyone knows, I was honored and proud to run with him. And Todd and I were with him in D.C. just a week ago." (Sarah Palin,Dec 2009) ************************************ DID Palin say or write these things or not? (Me) I don't know or F ing care. (Mad Dog posted on 2009-12-26 16:36:33 ET,post # 105 http://libertysflame.com/cgi-bin/readart.cgi?ArtNum=5510&Disp=114#C114)
#12. To: Liberator, AKA Stone, All (#0)
How long are you two going to hide from this thread?
Enquiring minds,and all dat.
"I adore John McCain, support him 100 percent and will do everything I can to support his reelection. As everyone knows, I was honored and proud to run with him. And Todd and I were with him in D.C. just a week ago." (Sarah Palin,Dec 2009) ************************************ DID Palin say or write these things or not? (Me) I don't know or F ing care. (Mad Dog posted on 2009-12-26 16:36:33 ET,post # 105 http://libertysflame.com/cgi-bin/readart.cgi?ArtNum=5510&Disp=114#C114)
#13. To: Abu el Banat, war, no gnu taxes, Bartcoprules, mininggold, Liberator, AKA Stone, All (#12)
Is it just me,or do Liberator and AKA Stone seem to be ignoring my pings to this thread?
Gee,I wonder why?
"I adore John McCain, support him 100 percent and will do everything I can to support his reelection. As everyone knows, I was honored and proud to run with him. And Todd and I were with him in D.C. just a week ago." (Sarah Palin,Dec 2009) ************************************ DID Palin say or write these things or not? (Me) I don't know or F ing care. (Mad Dog posted on 2009-12-26 16:36:33 ET,post # 105 http://libertysflame.com/cgi-bin/readart.cgi?ArtNum=5510&Disp=114#C114)
#14. To: sneakypete (#13)
First I saw of it.
#15. To: sneakypete (#0)
She's a loon, and if she were younger she'd no doubt be into Scientology or some spaceship cult. It's all part of the same mental opiate directed at the weak minded among us.
Am I a liberal or a conservative? - Fredo Mertz
#19. Destro (#18) Wassup dude? Let's get this place rocking. - Fredo Mertz
#16. To: sneakypete (#0)
If people like Dr. Laura can't pick and choose what they want the bible to mean all the fun goes out of it. It's very rude of this writer to notice that there are other requirements in there too.
"How many confirmed NV Mig kills do YOU have general? I only have three." - Mad Dog, the syphilitic psychopath
#17. To: sneakypete (#0)
My uncle has a farm. He violates Lev.19:19 by planting two different crops in the same field, as does his wife by wearing garments made of two different kinds of thread (cotton/polyester blend). He also tends to curse and blaspheme a lot. Is it really necessary that we go to all the trouble of getting the whole town together to stone them?
Oh, God, I'm doomed...
Today, I rode my bicycle into work...wearing spandex while naughty images of Clive Owen danced in my head. Then, I changed into clothes that included rayon, cotton, and, well, a certain underwire garment that will remain unnamed. The Internet connection was running so slowly that I blasphemed.
Please let me know the location of where I should go to be stoned (you know, the kind of stoning with rocks)? Still, those images of Clive will make it all worthwhile.
#18. To: Skip Intro, sneakypete (#16)
If people like Dr. Laura can't pick and choose what they want the bible to mean all the fun goes out of it. It's very rude of this writer to notice that there are other requirements in there too.
There's probably no end to the fetish's of the mind and flesh.
Certainly control is a fetish aswell,....one the Sheeple of the Great killing God/Church adopted long ago.,
or maybe just the Priest cast who conned the sheeple for generations.
The Priest is still sending us off to war to die in gods name.
Its so romantic,.....[Sarah Palin with nipple pokies sending the soldiers off in gods name,....outstanding!]
In the end,...its all selective and damning.
If you don't believe Mary is co redemptrix,.....your done.
If you don't believe in Jesus,........your done
on and on,....until everyone on Earth is hated and damned.
#19. To: Suzanne (#17)
Please let me know the location of where I should go to be stoned
No need for you to go to all that trouble. Just mail your address to Stone and he'll come to you.
"How many confirmed NV Mig kills do YOU have general? I only have three." - Mad Dog, the syphilitic psychopath
#20. To: war (#9)
You sure it wasn't a "bush"?
You are sooooo gay, dwarf!
#21. To: sneakypete (#0)
homosexuality is an abomination
Perverts will deny it.
#22. To: Suzanne (#17)
while naughty images of Clive Owen danced in my head.
I was impressed with Owens'acting in King Arthur,
The script and run of the movie lended to a more realistic possibility of a King Arthur.
Owens seems to bring out other actors character's allongside his which comes off as natural,
and not so force/driven as in other movies were characters like that would seldomly meet in the real world.
#23. To: Jethro Tull (#15)
She's a loon, and if she were younger she'd no doubt be into Scientology or some spaceship cult. It's all part of the same mental opiate directed at the weak minded among us.
Uh,huh. And why is she a loon? Is it because she is quoting the bible?
"I adore John McCain, support him 100 percent and will do everything I can to support his reelection. As everyone knows, I was honored and proud to run with him. And Todd and I were with him in D.C. just a week ago." (Sarah Palin,Dec 2009) ************************************ DID Palin say or write these things or not? (Me) I don't know or F ing care. (Mad Dog posted on 2009-12-26 16:36:33 ET,post # 105 http://libertysflame.com/cgi-bin/readart.cgi?ArtNum=5510&Disp=114#C114)
#24. To: A K A Stone (#14)
First I saw of it.
Ok,so according to the scripture and your understanding of the US Constitution,can I own my own Canadian? If not,why not?
"I adore John McCain, support him 100 percent and will do everything I can to support his reelection. As everyone knows, I was honored and proud to run with him. And Todd and I were with him in D.C. just a week ago." (Sarah Palin,Dec 2009) ************************************ DID Palin say or write these things or not? (Me) I don't know or F ing care. (Mad Dog posted on 2009-12-26 16:36:33 ET,post # 105 http://libertysflame.com/cgi-bin/readart.cgi?ArtNum=5510&Disp=114#C114)
#25. To: Suzanne (#17)
Oh, God, I'm doomed...
Well,you might as well earn it and stop by my place on your way to hell.
"I adore John McCain, support him 100 percent and will do everything I can to support his reelection. As everyone knows, I was honored and proud to run with him. And Todd and I were with him in D.C. just a week ago." (Sarah Palin,Dec 2009) ************************************ DID Palin say or write these things or not? (Me) I don't know or F ing care. (Mad Dog posted on 2009-12-26 16:36:33 ET,post # 105 http://libertysflame.com/cgi-bin/readart.cgi?ArtNum=5510&Disp=114#C114)
#26. To: Ibluafartsky (#20)
You are sooooo gay, dwarf!
King Abdullah has said that he doesn't know if Boy Jorge is queer or not,but "He sure does kiss funny!"
"I adore John McCain, support him 100 percent and will do everything I can to support his reelection. As everyone knows, I was honored and proud to run with him. And Todd and I were with him in D.C. just a week ago." (Sarah Palin,Dec 2009) ************************************ DID Palin say or write these things or not? (Me) I don't know or F ing care. (Mad Dog posted on 2009-12-26 16:36:33 ET,post # 105 http://libertysflame.com/cgi-bin/readart.cgi?ArtNum=5510&Disp=114#C114)
#27. To: Parrot with speed dial (#22)
I was impressed with Owens'acting in King Arthur
I don't choose my lustful wanderings willy-nilly (LOL).
#28. To: sneakypete (#26)
"He sure does kiss funny!"
You tried it? UGH!!!!
#29. To: sneakypete (#26)
Strange that Mohammed never recieved any information in the cave from the Angel about the British,Standard Oil or the Bush Family.
Kinda weird that god would completely forget to talk about the Money : )
#30. To: Suzanne (#27)
I don't choose my lustful wanderings willy-nilly (LOL).
Me too,
Sometimes being attacked by Cougars can have a happy ending : )
#31. To: Parrot with speed dial (#30)
Sometimes being attacked by Cougars can have a happy ending : )
LOL...you made my "virtual" night.
#32. To: Suzanne (#31)
Sometimes being attacked by Cougars can have a happy ending : )LOL...you made my "virtual" night.
: )
I get dinner at a house in these dreams
Not the metro sexual tofu like at restaurants....real food,
No husbands burst into the house at anytime in the dream either : )
#33. To: Parrot with speed dial (#32)
I get dinner at a house in these dreamsNot the metro sexual tofu like at restaurants....real food,
No husbands burst into the house at anytime in the dream either : )
Sadly, even the most elegantly prepared and savored dishes leave scraps behind… and, somehow, they become tawdry remnants.
And the lover who most ardently helped you undress beforehand seems disinterested in helping you restore your garments afterward.
Such is the nature of impulsive acts...but as I'm on my way out of Dodge, I'll give you a call.
#34. To: Suzanne (#33)
Such is the nature of impulsive acts...but as I'm on my way out of Dodge, I'll give you a call.
I'm dreaming of warm places by the sea,
One day in my future,...that may be possible,....thanks to the Inheritance genie : )
I do not mind learning Greek,....or going to get fresh food at the market each day by scooter from a white plaster house overlooking the Aegean.
Greek Music- Dalaras, Andreatos - Mi mou lete gia afti (live)
#35. To: Parrot with speed dial (#34)
If you saw ... the gun first --- You're gay.
#36. To: sneakypete (#24)
First I saw of it.Ok,so according to the scripture
Your going to hell according to God. You can always repent and change your mind and seek forgiveness.
#37. To: A K A Stone (#36)
Judge not, lest you be judged.
"Lets [sic] rent a room." ~ Jethro Tull to Rotara
#38. To: Fred Mertz (#37)
Judge not, lest you be judged.
That doesn't mean be a hypocrite. Like says I judge you because of that faggity pair of pants you always wear. Then I go wear them.
I noticed you said you would pray for someone the other day. Who do you pray to if you don't believe? It makes no sense.
If you read the Bible you would know it charges us with judging. Judge righteous judgement.
#39. To: A K A Stone (#38)
You are on my prayer list. You know who the saint of lost causes is?
"Lets [sic] rent a room." ~ Jethro Tull to Rotara
#40. To: Fred Mertz (#39)
Saints are christians. Real christians. Tell me your story. I gotta run in a sec but who knows I might read it before I leave.
#41. To: A K A Stone (#40)
May the sacred heart of Jesus be adored, glorified, loved and preserved now and forever. Sacred heart of Jesus have mercy on us, Saint Jude worker of Miracles pray for us, Saint Jude helper and keeper of hopeless pray for us, Thank you Saint Jude. Amen.
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jude_the_Apostle
"Lets [sic] rent a room." ~ Jethro Tull to Rotara
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